Hypothetically, how would you go about pleasing a woman if you can only get turned on by burps and she refuses to burp for you?
I guess obvious things would be stuff like cunnilingus or simply using your fingers, but does anyone have any other suggestions? Also, I’d really prefer not to have to rely on outside things like sex toys or viagra.
A couple of things:
First, are you completely, 100% positive that burps are the only thing that turn you on? When I was younger I used to believe this was the case, but now that I’m older and more accepting I’ve come to realize that it’s just a component of my attraction in general - a fun bit of spice to add to the experience overall. Human psychology is weird - the more ashamed I was of this fetish, the stronger I felt like it was the only thing that could get me off - it was a self-fulfilling prophecy of shame I guess. So if that’s something you’re worried about, I’d say try to relax, enjoy yourself, and you’ll start to find other things you’re attracted to as well. Nowadays I notice that personality is a huge component of my attraction (even sexual) to people.
Second, sex is more than just penetration, and it’s more than just any particular “act” as well. Sex isn’t just “position 1” + “position 2” + … until one or both of you finish - sex is the whole experience. It’s the foreplay, the kissing, the cuddling, the touching, the talking, etc. There’s a lot to enjoy in sex even outside the act of “intercourse”, so just try to appreciate the ride, and everything else involved in it.
I think a lot of guys get this idea in their head that they have to have an erection the entire time, and they need to be ready to fuck non-stop, 100% of the time. I think this is just an expectation they get from porn, and most women don’t really expect/demand that. Like, I’ve had encounters where I just performed oral on them, cuddled, made-out, oral again, made out some more, etc., and it was great, she was super satisfied. I was hard maybe like, 15% of the time total, and I didn’t cum, but that’s ok, I still had fun lol.
Third, if your partner doesn’t want to engage in your fetish, maybe that’s something you should consider in whether or not you should even continue the relationship? I know that’s a big leap since I don’t know you or your partner at all, but personally, I’m looking for someone who wants to make sex fun for me, as I’m looking to do the same for them. Plus, having that spectre of insecurity wondering “does my partner think I’m weird” hanging over the act will almost invariably make me struggle to get aroused. If you feel like you have to perform for them (e.g. mask your desires, present as someone you think they’ll find attractive, etc.), then you won’t perform well at all.
Finally, toys are actually OP in the bedroom. I think a lot of women struggle to orgasm from just penetration, so having a vibrator in the mix is like, a secret weapon lol. Seriously consider getting one, it’s a game changer.
Idk I’d like to hear the women on the forums chime in on this as well tho
such a good response. ditto all of this.
I think lesbian sex has a much clearer understanding of sex not being one specific kind of activity but rather a lot of different things that can be done in turns or simultaneously.
But really, if your fetish is so important and your partner isn’t willing to engage with it, it’s really okay to have that be a dealbreaker. If you just want to have sex with a woman who burps for you, you can choose that and it will limit your options but it’s better than settling for something that doesn’t seem to fulfill either of you (hypothetically)
I don’t know, I don’t need burps per se to perform. Not being able to be turned on or perform unless burping is involved is a problem in and of itself.
Thank you for taking the time to make such a detailed response, I really appreciate that.
If I am being honest, the “hypothetically” in my statement was doing a lot of heavy lifting, I have never actually been in a relationship before. The reason I made this post is because the thought of being completely unable to satisfy any future partner I may have is something I worry about a lot. I know burping isn’t something everyone is comfortable with and if I was ever in a relationship with someone who was unwilling or unable burp I would still want to know how to service them at least.
The advice you gave really did help me feel better though, from what you described it seems like this is a process that there isn’t one immediate answer to and it’s something I’ll just have to figure out when I’m faced with it. If it’s not something I can prepare for than I guess there’s no sense worrying about it, which does put my mind at ease somewhat, so again thank you.
I always knew that was the truth. It’s unfortunate but I can’t get turned on by normal things, I’ve tried but it just wasn’t working. Burping isn’t the only thing that turns me on, but ironically it’s the least weird of all my fetishes.
What do you consider ‘normal things’? Can you be turned on by a naked woman?