I wanted to make a topic for people to discuss their experiences navigating the fetish in relationships. I’ve seen plenty of topics about being unsure how to bring up the subject of the fetish, but what about for people who are in relationships with partners who already know about and accept the fetish? What are the challenges you’ve faced and how have you tried to make the fetish part of your life as a couple in a way that feels good for you both?
I feel like once you start getting comfortable with someone, it’s easy to open up about. I’ve only been in two relationships in my life but in both, I was open and told them probably a couple months in. Both of them were accepting and didn’t view it as anything bad. If someone can’t accept you for it, they’re definitely not someone you’d want to be with. That being said, I did still feel nervous about opening up about it. BUT, if someone can’t accept you for who you are, you dodged a bullet and should not feel ashamed about yourself!
3 Likes
I appreicate the thought. But like I said, not really interested in advice about telling someone (I’ve gotten pretty good at that part and it’s covered in other topics). What have your experiences been like after that point with the partners you’ve told? Was it easy to integrate into your sex life? Was it a point of conflict? How did you navigate it?
5 Likes
Now this is a topic im very interested in and looking for advice. I was in a relationship from early last year to early this year with a girl I met on the internet (it was not purely online, we met up twice) and in the span of our relationship I told her early on about it and seemed fine and fine to do it for me as well.
Here’s the bad part, I obviously felt the need to share that Im also part of these forums and generally search for videos of girls burping, it’s not a fumble, I really feel like being open about something like that is important, it’s like people in a relationship sharing that they watch porn, because this is about the same, its about self pleasure besides the person you are with.
We broke up for a plethora of other reasons, but she was always adamant that this was a part that always irked her about me, my question is, how do you fully abandon or limit this fetish for your relationship? Do you even do it? Is your partner okay with you consuming that kind of content? I found it extremely difficult to break away, and personally I dont think its a matter on if i “truly” loved her or not, it’s an addiction.
3 Likes
I’ve met a lot of women in my life who are fine with websites like this, or videos or porn etc. The ones who can’t tolerate it exist, but in my experience they’re a minority. With them you can maybe explain that it’s just an equivalent of romantic/erotic stories which women tend to like, and which don’t negatively affect the relationship in any way. But some people are just jealous past the point of being reasonable, and there’s not much you can do about it.
It’s not hopeless by any means though. I’d suggest being as open as possible in the future when meeting someone new (at least as open as you can be without crossing the line into being creepy) and that then would establish norms, what she can expect, and give her a chance to leave if she finds it absolutely problematic.
she was always adamant that this was a part that always irked her about me
I wouldn’t give this much thought. People say all kinds of stuff when a relationship ends, most of which isn’t really true.
2 Likes
for some women, porn is a boundary in relationships. for others it’s a non-issue. however I can tell you most women are turned off by porn addicted men, fetish related or not. in my experience they are shit in bed. men who compulsively seek stimulation through porn tend to be disconnected from true intimacy. there’s a difference between casual consumption, which doesn’t bother me in the slightest personally, and habitual, compulsive behavior. if you can’t stop, if it affects how present you are with a partner, or if it makes them feel second best, then that’s less so a burping fetish problem but an intimacy issue with your partner.
9 Likes
I’ve been thinking for a while actually(and maybe should have made a topic). Is there a thought people have when they want to put the media consumption behind you? Like do you see yourself in your 50’s on this forum on whatever media site that is popular, looking for burps? Do you retire when you are in a relationship that is long term?
I think a lot of us grew up consuming content and it may be more of a challenge for us to pull away from it which can be problematic when you do get into a relationship.
I’m not sure there are a lot of women who would be ok with the way a lot of us consume content especially if it is done frequently.
I actually at times, think about a forum member who used to be around that had to deal with this in his marriage. I would love to hear an update on him and how he is doing.
9 Likes
The last two women I was with would send me audio or video of them burping so I didn’t really desire to find content of other people as much. They also burped for me during sex. It might be worth it to ask for these things if burp “porn” seems too difficult to abandon. But neither minded me watching porn of any kind in my own time, nor did I care how they masturbated.
4 Likes
I suppose my situation was more complicated but I get you
I really like this question.
To offer my own perspective (and not meaning to imply that every can or should feel the same), I’ve found that whenever I’m with someone, I’d always prefer to cum with them, and barring that, to them, and any other stimulus feels weird. But I also don’t have a super high sex drive so having one or two amazing orgasms every week is enough for me to feel satisfied (even if I could get off more often when I was single with weaker orgasms).
But there is that question of what happens if that’s not enough. My girlfriend asked me a few weeks back if I still wanted to get off to videos of other girls burping and I was glad to be able to tell her no, but she also let me know that would be fine if I did. But I’d feel really weird about doing that. For me, I would always rather get off with another person burping for me than watch a video and my comfort with the fetish got so much better once I decentered online content like that. I still like to check this forum for discussions but I have no need of the content posted here.
I hope all of y’all can get to that point and if it feels impossible, it might be worth questioning if you might have a problem and seek help for porn addiction (though I don’t mean to stigmatize higher libidos)
5 Likes
I kinda want to poke back at this because I’ve been spending the last few days with my girl and I’d like to say something has suddenly changed and I’m not sure what
So me and my girl have been long distance dating, we’ve been together for a little under 9 months and I went to visit her last month, and right now she’s currently visiting me. When I went to visit her, I traveled across the country (1700 miles) to see her, which was a long shot but we had a lot of fun. Here’s where the issue comes around. When we were having our fun time, I noticed I wasn’t getting hard downstairs. I’ll be one to admit this because I didn’t think it would happen to me but it did. Don’t get me wrong she had me incredibly turned on, but I just was not getting it up. I’m not sure if it was because I was extremely far away from home and somewhere I’ve never been before, or if it was me being nervous having sex with someone new (my body count is 1 and the last intercourse I’ve had was in December 2019) or it could’ve been lack of sleep (I got stuck at the airport for 17 hours because my flight got canceled originally)
I figured there may be multiple factors to why I wasn’t getting it up, and lucky for me she was a saint and understood. She actually ended up getting her period, which some may find it gross some may not but we weren’t opposed to doing so with her being on her period. So we tried again, and still nothing from me. I was a little confused at first, so I excused myself to the bathroom and told her it may be because of being nervous. So I got out my phone and tried watching some of my favorite burping videos, and though it took longer than normal for it to get up, it eventually did (after like 15 minutes). So from there I got out of the bathroom and tried again, and unfortunately to no prevail I had nothing. I even tried letting her mess with it but nothing happened. I was a little upset with myself because I wanted to pleasure her and I just couldn’t seem to get myself there. The last night I was there I was by myself and out of frustration tried and see if I could maybe masturbait, at which I still struggled a little, but not much. At this point I was a little concerned that I may have gotten myself in a bad hole where I only get hard to burps. I tried to not think of it and to not worry about my performance and told her next time we see each other we can try again, since this time she would come to me rather than me go to her.
Fast forward to now she is currently visiting me, and I have solved the issue. We have been staying at my parents house so we don’t want to go at it while we are here, but we have been cuddling and the occasional kissing here and there. That’s when I realize that downstairs my penis was getting big with no issues. I think it may have just been that I was far away from home and was nervous about being where I was visiting, that’s why I couldn’t get it up. I was debating on telling her about my fetish because I know she would be willing to do that for me, but from what I’ve seen from her she doesn’t really burp much and they aren’t big either. I don’t have to worry though because it seems I can get it up just fine now with having our intimacy time, and when we go out for the weekend we can have our fun time.
With that being said, I was deciding on whether I wanted to go all out on my fetish or deciding to cut it to a minimum altogether, and I think imma cut it to a minimum altogether. Eventually I will want to live with my girl and I don’t foresee myself ever pleasuring myself on my own at the rate that I am whenever she lives with me. Now that doesn’t mean I won’t EVER not pleasure just myself ever again, but it will be very rare to do so. I believe that most of your intimacy time should be with your partner, but every once in a blue moon there’s no reason why you can’t enjoy yourself, especially when said significant other is gone for a little while for any reason (work trip, visiting family and you aren’t able to attend, all girls trip (or boys)).
Me saying that, this is something I’m doing for myself, for anyone else that might think the same, I want you to know that if your partner loves you for you, you really should not be afraid to introduce them to your fetish. Bouncing back to something I said earlier, when I couldn’t get it up my girl was very understanding as to why I couldn’t. She didn’t think the worst that like I maybe didn’t find her attractive enough to get it up, or that I didn’t want to do it with her, she just knew I was going through a lot and said she’s always open to talk to her about anything no matter what. I just want whoever reads this (and congrats if you made it this far) to know that it’s ok to be open, everyone is weird in their own way, and your partner should be the first person to know that.
3 Likes
Just as an aside, if ever you can’t get hard, I hope you still do everything else you can do in your power to get her off, be it with your tongue, your fingers, a toy of hers, etc. I would also recommend supplementing with l-citrulline or l-arginine for enhanced blood flow. Of course a lot of sex is mental, irrespective of what you’ve got in your pants, so try not to be hard (haha) on yourself if you suddenly can’t perform.
3 Likes
I’m glad you’re moving past that difficulty and getting to know your body better. Thanks for being so vulnerable with this.
Wanted to comment on this part tho
Sorry to sound like a broken record, but I really think it will help your overall relationship to be honest with her about this part of yourself, sooner than later. I get that the feeling that it might be something you have to tell her is gone, but I still think it’d be good to be honest.
I think someone’s burping “skill” or natural inclination shouldn’t be a deciding factor in whether to tell them about your fetish, despite seeing a lot of people on here in relationships frame it that way. My girlfriend (who I am so in love with) couldn’t really burp when we first started seeing each other because she was so in the habit of surpressing. But flash forward two and a half months and she’s phenomenal. I told her about my fetish pretty much immediately when we started texting, and I wonder if I’d had the attitude that some people have about waiting to see how a partner naturally acts, if it would have been harder to bring the fetish up later when I knew that’s something that was harder for her. My point is, when you invite someone into this part of your life, they can surprise you in a way they can’t if you just secretely wait to observe things. Be direct. Be bold. The longer you wait, the weirder it is.
5 Likes
Nailed it!
1 Like
Yes absolutely. I used my finger when I couldn’t really get it up so I didn’t leave her stranded after turning her on. Also part of our struggle, and I don’t want this to sound wrong or like this is an Ego boost for me, but I genuinely did not fit inside of her. I am above average size for a male in the us, but the girth actually was too big to fit inside of her. She was SUPER tight and as much as that’s like every guy’s golden dream for their girl be to super tight, I found it pretty annoying. Eventually after trying enough we were able to fit me in but it ended up starting to hurt me too by trying to force it in 
but overall we made it work
1 Like
I couldn’t tell her directly, but I did start hinting at it to her a little bit. She has small burps most of the time but she had a bigger than normal one twice and I replied with “nice” both times she did. She didn’t comment on it but this is me slowly trying to work on telling her. I think once we are fully moved in with one another that’s when I can tell her, which hopefully if things can go right that’ll be sooner rather than later.
1 Like
To add on to this though, like I had mentioned before I’m trying to not heavily rely on burps any more to turn me on. After our first sex encounter I realized I’m a little too desensitized to vanilla sex and need that constant stimulation from the burp videos I would watch to get myself up. I’m not planning on getting rid of the fetish altogether, but in a better way to put it i want it to be a support to our sex life not the foundation.
1 Like
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. My advice is to NEVER make the focus of any relationship about the burping. If you do, then that relationship is bound to fail. Focus on the individual, their likes, goals, mindset, ect. Burping should always come second. Consider it to be the cherry on top.
Through my personal experiences it’s best to wait until the two of you are comfortable with each other before revealing your fetish. It may be a passion for you, but its just a burp for them. I’ve been with some girls who’ve been weirded out by the fetish, and others who weren’t bothered by it.
One of my ex use to belch very loudly all the time. We use to be co-workers, and she never burped around me before. Then we started dating, she was sitting in my car and then she just let out a monstrous belch. Afterwards she said, “Sorry I just feel so comfortable around you.” I didn’t freak out and I didn’t spill my guts over my love of burps either. I just let it be and showed her I wasn’t bothered by it. Afterwards she started belching all the time around me, even in public.
One night when we were cuddling, she burped and noticed that I got hard when she burped. She made a joke about it and that’s when I finally revealed that I had a burping fetish. Mind you we were deep in our relationship at this point. She was a little weird out at first, which is reasonable because it’s not a “normal “ thing for most. But because we’ve had established a solid relationship built on love, trust, connection, ect she warmed up to the idea of it. She still belched like crazy around me, but now she would do it in my face and during intercourse because she knew it was a turn on.
Moral of the story, find a partner that you value and cherish first. If they are a burper cool, and if they aren’t that’s cool too. At the end of the day it’s better that you find someone who makes you happy.
8 Likes
I second this. I really don’t think it’s a necessary thing to tell your partner right off the bat that you enjoy burping. I’ve also said this once and I’ll say it again, as a guy, if a girl burps around you, that means she comfortable doing so around you. I have many female friends that will let one rip (or a million) whenever we are just hanging out. They are comfortable doing so, if they weren’t, then they would just try and hide it. It’s so easy to know because then you’ll be around people you don’t know and they won’t release a single one. Even my girl now, she may have tiny burps but she burps around me all the time and that’s because she’s comfortable around me. The moment a girl doesn’t feel comfortable around you, they make it known. That’s always how girls are, they make their intentions known.
Interesting prompt for a thread. Reminds me of something I’ve been grappling with for a while now.
My girlfriend is very accepting of the fetish and enjoys burping for me. The only problem is I think she burps too much.
She does loud, obnoxious burps nonstop throughout the day when we’re at home, enough to where I seriously wonder if there’s something clinically wrong with her. Her burps don’t really do much for me now, landing about 20%-30% of the time. Sometimes she does it in the right moment or with a really sexy tone, but usually it’s background noise or something I hope she doesn’t do while I’m on the phone with my parents or for work.
I tend to like low-pitched, rumbly burps, the kind that sound relieving, like they needed to happen. Hers usually sound shrill and forced. 90% of them happen in day-to-day activity, not in sexy moments, so it would feel weird to coach her into burping in a way that gets me off more. I’ve maybe tried coaching her with one-off comments two or three times in the past couple years, but it doesn’t stick and I don’t belabor the point. Plus, she can usually burp in a sexy moment and it’ll turn me right on anyway. Yet, contrary to burps, she could flash me her tits anytime she wants and I’d be ready to go at a moment’s notice.
Have I gotten desensitized to her burps? Is it like how people don’t always look as beautiful as possible all the time? Have I heard too many burps in porn that I now expect every burp to be a 10? Do I not like the way she burps in particular? Would asking her to change the way she burps be rude like asking her to change her physical appearance? Do I resent her burps sometimes because they happen in moments I’m not open to being sexy? Is this normal? These are all questions that come to mind sometimes.
I dunno. I feel ungrateful.
4 Likes